craigslist killers

A recent story that has been in the news, and has some extra significance for me because one of the perpetrators is from the town where my sister currently lives, is regarding the "Craigslist killers."  I do not know all of the details, but I do know that they lured men to their deaths with a job offer for only $300 a week, plus board.  That is what stuck out to me.  The people who responded to the ad were largely men who were beyond down on their luck.

One person in particular who was killed was Timothy Kern, who was described in the earlier linked article as taking the job to try to support his three kids.  I don't know that I have much to add to this, but that thought had a significant visceral impact on me.  The guy took a job, and one that ended up being too good to be true, paying basically minimum wage to support his three kids, and that is what ended up getting him killed.  Not to sound trite, but Mr. Kern just could not get a break.

These sorts of stories make me feel very fortunate for the opportunities I have been given.  Not everyone has the opportunity to attain higher education.  Not everyone is able to find work to pay for that education and life after the education—especially not in recent years.  Not everyone has seen provision throughout the situations of their lives like I have.  A lot of people are looking at a future where their skill set is unfortunately obsolete or will be out of demand for a long while through no fault of their own.

Why would I focus on provision rather than family when being thankful?  It is not because I am unthankful for my family, but because the ability to provide for a family is the basis for most men's self-worth.  In thinking about the men in this situation the thing at the forefront of my mind is how worthless a lot of them have to feel, especially those with kids they are unable to support.  Those of us whose hope is in Christ should not place our worth in temporary and arbitrary things like that, but God's work is certainly not complete in me.

All of this being said, who really knows what the future holds.  Maybe I'll be challenged with joblessness at some point in the future.  I hope not, but I wouldn't be the only one to have gone through it if I did.  Maybe things will get bad enough that I have to look into sketchy opportunities.  Again, I hope not.  I can be thankful in the good things that God has given me now, though.  What I would hate would be to run into hard times then realize too late how little I appreciated the good times when I was living them.

As an aside, if you're looking for someone to pray for Mr. Kern's children have to be at the top of the list.  I just cannot imagine...

broken

I mentioned earlier that I was going through a Bible reading plan with some people in my Church. That is why I have not been very active here over the past few months. We completed the Bible last week, so I hope that opens the schedule a bit.

I was talking with my sister about this reading a few weeks ago and she pointed out something that struck me as well. If you believe that the Bible is from God and you read it, it's hard not to be convicted about elements of your life that you would otherwise think are not a big deal.

The theme I got from the reading this time is that the type of person that God wants is one who He can break, then take the pieces and put them together into a manner of His choosing. This theme shows up in the Old Testament through Job, Abraham, Moses, David, and all of the prophets. In the New Testament it shows up in Christ, all of the apostles, and almost everyone Christ talked to (Nicodemus, the rich young ruler, Mary sister of Martha, Martha sister of Mary, etc). The teachings through the Epistles dwell on enduring through and growing in turmoil almost to an annoying level, especially in Hebrews and 1 & 2 Peter but in most of Paul's letters as well.

There are other things that I learned in the reading, and I have to note that my main observation was largely because I came into the reading with the open question of what God really does want from His followers. I wanted to pay attention for what really is living by the Spirit, and this is what I got. Living by the Spirit is allowing God to do whatever to you He wants.

I probably will not do another reading this aggressive for a long while, but there is no denying that God can use Scripture to challenge and change people. I know that He is challenging me. The question is what change will result.

the turkey butcher

In honor of the Thanksgiving holiday I present a poem my sister and I wrote for a creative writing assignment when she was in junior high and I was in in high school. It is a parody of the poem "The Village Blacksmith" by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. I'd encourage you to read the original before reading the parody because it makes more sense that way.

The Turkey Butcher

Under a spreading chestnut tree
The turkey butcher stands;
The butcher, a bloody man is he,
With red and calloused hands;
And the muscles of his scrawny arms
Are strong as rubber bands.

His nails are crisp, and black, and long,
His eyes are like the tan;
His hands are wet at the turkey’s debt,
He years to clean his hands;
The whole world looks him in the face,
He is a mental case, you understand.

Week in, week out, from morn till night,
You can hear his mallet blow,
You can hear him swing his heavy hand,
As he screams, “Yowwwwwwwww!:
Like an Angus ringing his old cow bell,
When the evening sun is low.

And children coming home from school
Looking at the open door;
They love to see the fatal hand,
And hear the turkeys roar,
And catch the feathers that fly,
Like the snow of the blizzard of 1624.

He goes on Sunday to the church,
And sits among the boys;
He hears the parson pray and preach,
He hears an angel turkey’s voice,
Singing with the village choir,
And it makes his heart rejoice.

It sounds to him like dinner’s voice,
Singing from Paradise!
He needs not think of it once more,
How in the pot it lies;
And with a hard rough hand he wipes
A tear out of his eyes.

Toiling, hungry, sorrowing,
Onward through life he goes;
Each morning he sees the turkeys come in,
By evening on a plate it goes;
Something attempted, something done,
Will this poem never close?

Thanks, thanks to thee my sort of worthy friend,
For listening when thou needed not!
Thus at the flaming oven of life
Our turkeys must be brought;
Thus on the butcher table shaped
Each cutting deed and thought.

baby girl

It has taken a bit longer to post this than I would have liked. A combination of issues conspired to keep me from bothering with this until now, not the least of which was the fact that the baby's pictures were already posted on Facebook, which drained some of my motivation. Also, I am not sure what blog name we are giving to our baby girl at this point.

Golden started having contractions late Sunday night two weeks ago (the sixteenth). We headed to the hospital a little after midnight for monitoring after consulting with the doctor. I remember thinking that this was going to make for a very bad Monday if the baby did not actually come out.

Around 3 AM the doctor told the hospital to move Golden into a delivery room so she could break her water at the break of dawn. Apparently, we have different notions of what the break of dawn is, because the doctor showed up around 8:30 AM, which was about an hour-and-a-half later than what I understood the break of dawn to be.

During delivery, the doctor noted that she had never seen a baby wriggle so much at that stage, so she commented that we have a feisty baby on our hands. With two weeks experience, I do not disagree with this assessment. Our healthy baby (six pounds, thirteen ounces) was born at 1:31 PM that afternoon. This is notable because it was on my sister's birthday and on the anniversary of when I asked Golden on our first date.

With NJ I spent almost all of my time at the hospital. Since Golden's mom was at the house taking care of NJ, I did spend a couple of hours every day at the house, and I had a few more errands that I had to run between the house and the hospital. That broke the day up nicely for me, though it probably made things a tad more boring for Golden.

We found out right before we left the hospital that a kidney issue that had been found on our sonograms had cleared up. It was one of those things that the doctor told us usually does heal itself by the time the baby is born. It still feels like a bit of a miracle, and is quite a relief.

Tomorrow we have to go in for the latest in a series of weight checks that the doctor ordered on our daughter. She lost a lot of weight in her first four days, but has gained back pretty regularly since. Both Golden and I think it is a bit ridiculous that we have to go in for this specific weight check because this one is just because she didn't technically reach her birth weight in the last weight check. They should have enough data to see she is growing very rapidly.

Anyway, I have been meaning to get to this and now I have. Hopefully, I can get on a regular schedule shortly now.

the past week

My sister visited this past week to spend some time with NJ, so I took the week off from work so we could more properly visit with family.

I picked my sister up at the airport in the late afternoon on Monday. Not much happened on that particular evening. We watched Nancy Drew. It was more or less what I expected.

We were supposed to have the gutters replaces on Monday as well. I was hoping they would be replaced by the time I got back from the airport. Eventually I got a phone call saying that the work would be postponed until Wednesday morning.

Tuesday, we went to the doctor to find out that we are having a girl (I know, we already announced that). Around supper time, we visited Legends. Now that we have been there a few times, the place actually feels kind of small. It didn't feel that way the first time I went there. That night we watched National Treasure 2, which I think is much better than the original.

Wednesday was NJ's birthday. We opened presents and had cake at lunch time.

We were planning to go to the pool around 3:30PM, but that is when the gutter guy showed up. It turned out that he was just there to make a final measurement and make the gutters rather than put them up, so he left in short order and we visited the pool. We spent quite a bit of time in the kiddie pool, then as we were walking into the big pool we heard thunder and the pool shut down. Bummer.

That night we watched Witness for the Prosecution, which is an old British movie based on a story that Agatha Christy wrote. Not a bad narrative, though it contained a lot of dialog, so it is not for people who don't like a lot of talking.

Thursday morning, the gutter guys showed up right as we were leaving. We visited my grandmother and great-grandmother who live a two hour drive away. Actually, that is two hours if you don't get sidetracked. I took a wrong turn and added a half hour to the trip.

NJ was especially fussy on Thursday. He screamed for the first half hour to hour that he was at his great-grandmother's house. I felt bad, but there was little we could do. From there we headed to Golden's family's house in the Springfield area.

Friday was the fourth. I celebrated by being lazy. NJ played in the back yard some. That night we set off some small fireworks. Nothing real noteworthy.

Saturday, we visited a nature center in Springfield, then traveled back to the OP. Sunday, I took my sister back to the airport.

Typically, the mark of a good break from work is when it feels like forever since I have been to the office. Since it feels like ages since I was at work, it must have been a good break.

something lighthearted

Every topic I can think of lately is either dull or deep. That is a problem because a person can only take so much of that. Here are a few random lighthearted thoughts off the top of my head.

Golden and I are expecting to find out the sex of our new baby today. She will probably post that information before I do, unless I just add it as a comment to this post.

I never realized how much kids can talk without using real words. NJ will talk for extended periods of time and I know that he is genuinely trying to rely information to me, but I can't decipher most of what he says. There are random words I recognize, but the words I pick out represent so little of everything that he is saying. How much of his conversation is real and what is he actually talking about?

There is very little that is more enjoyable than sleeping in. Everyone knows I feel this way. I have taken the opportunity to sleep in since I am not at work this week. Does anyone else get a weird feeling that his or her brain has not fully turned on for a couple hours after waking up late? I get this all of the time, but it is the most strong for me when I sleep in.

I'll never understand people who drive slow in the passing lane. The passing lane is for passing.

Our house has felt overrun by bugs in the last month or two. I have seen more insects inside the house this year compared to every other year we have lived here. I am seriously considering a call to the exterminator, but I don't know if most exterminators have simple, spray around to discourage bugs from coming inside rates.

This is my first post that is automatically posted. If all goes well, it should post while I am still happily asleep at the moment that this is posted. The very thought brings a contented smile to my face.

jarts

For some strange reason, we were discussing lawn darts at work a few days ago. This brought back some memories. It also reminded me of some questions that I have always had about why I had the opportunity to have memories of lawn darts.

My grandparents had a set of lawn darts that all of the grandkids played with when we were growing up. I don't know how many countless games we played, but it was more than just a few. Not only that, this was when we were anywhere from five to twelve years old. We were probably not as responsible with the game as we should have been since we were so young.

I do not know why we were allowed to play the game. None of our parents were uncaring or in the least bit permissive. Our grandparents were even more cautious. I guess no one really conceptualized that the game could be more dangerous than any other outdoor activity.

My experience with Jarts ended one day when my cousin tried to throw a dart over my sister's head and miscalculated. She was struck near her eyebrow, but she was not seriously wounded. It shook everyone up enough that it was the last time we played the game. I think the set got thrown out immediately. I do know I never saw it in the house after that day.

Given that experience, it actually perplexes me that someone ever thought this game was a good idea. I know it originated in an era that was not as litigious as society is now, but in retrospect it was probably a bad idea to design a game in which children hurl metalic missiles at a target near where their opponents are standing.

Lawn darts were actually banned for sale within the United States in 1988, probably due to other experiences where victims were not as lucky as my sister.

Back to my discussion at work, we found a place that apparently sells lawn dart parts to individuals in the United States under the assumption that selling parts gets through a loophole in the Consumer Product Safety Board's rules. I have some moral issues with someone doing this, but at least the people buying the game know what they are getting into. If they don't I hope they do not get the opportunity to learn the hard way.

I do have to offset my overly cautious side, though, with an observation. In it's defense, the game was a whole lot of fun.

essentials of philosophy

I decided maybe a year or two ago that I should learn at least the basics of philosophy if I truly have an interest of learning truth. If I really want to seek truth I need to understand how other people believe they came to truth, even if I do not ultimately agree with their methods or conclusions.

Because of this I got the aforementioned philosophy joke book and I asked for philosophy books for birthday and Christmas gifts. My sister then got me the book Essentials of Philosophy: The Basic Concepts of the World's Greatest Thinkers by James Mannion, which is published through Barnes & Noble.

Overall, I like the structure of the book. The chapters are essentially collections of descriptions of the perspectives of philosophers who fit into a specific category. So, for example, there is a chapter on Existentialism that is broken into five parts, each describing the perspectives of a different existential philosopher. The reason I like this is that it allows me to get a summarized view of what each person believed and why, so I can know who I want to investigate further.

The book also has its weaknesses, however. Probably the most significant weakness is that the author has a very hard time hiding his opinions. He takes every opportunity to bash the Catholic Church. He is also willing to make excuses for philosophers and philosophies that he likes, such as why it was not Nietzsche's fault the Nazis liked him so much. Normally I don't care about editorializing, but I read this as more of a text book, so I expected the author to be more objective.

Mannion actually takes the editorializing to the level of saying that the three major monotheistic religions (Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) should just learn to get along since they worship the same God anyway. To an outsider, whether the different religions serve the same God is more a question of semantics, but he should still know better than to make his assertion in this particular book.

I did notice that some philosophical ideas were skipped that I figured would be covered. Among these were Schrödinger's cat and Pascal's wager. I do not expect every philosophical idea to be covered in a philosophy overview such as this, but I consider the two above concepts important enough to Philosophy that they should have been included in the book. There is probably something else that should have been included that I simply do not know about.

Finally, there are some minor typographical issues that I found some people online complain about, but most of those do not impact the accuracy of the information that I care about. These are only noteworthy if this will annoy a particular reader.

Now, for the real purpose of the post. As I was reading the book I started thinking that it would be a good idea to do a series of posts on different philosophical perspectives and how they mesh with how I believe. The book provides a great structure to design a series, so much of the design work would be done. Also, it would be interesting to see which philosophies agree with or contradict my interpretation of the Bible. I would probably cover thirty to forty different perspectives, so this would not be a short series.

There are a few reasons why I think this would be a good idea and a few why I think it would be a bad idea.

The Good:

1. Some readers will enjoy it.
2. I believe that it is good to seek truth.
3. The series would not be too pervasive because I would only post something on the series once every couple of weeks.
4. This gives me a ready-made topic to post on.

The Bad:

1. Some readers will be bored by it.
2. I will probably have to oversimplify the philosophies that I discuss to keep the posts manageable.
3. I am not an expert.
4. This will take effort on my part.

What do you think? Would you enjoy or be bored by this type of discussion? Is it something that will be worth the time and effort?

important day

There are two notable things about today.

First, I asked Golden out for our first date ten years ago today. We celebrated last night with dinner and a movie. It was nice to have a night when we didn't need to worry about NJ, so we greatly appreciate our sitter giving us so much time.

It's hard to believe that it was ten years ago that I left a note with Golden telling her I was interested in her and asking if she was too. Kind of a high school thing to do, but I was eighteen.

Just about everyone I have mentioned this to has responded with, "You still keep track of when you started dating?" I don't usually feel like a sentimental fool.

Also, this is my sister's birthday. It was not on purpose that I asked Golden out on my sister's birthday so I would remember the date better, but it did work out conveniently. I should probably call my sister to wish her well shortly.

Happy birthday, Miss Carisma, and happy ten years, Golden!

the week in review

Golden already mentioned that my sister visited this week. I'll just add that it was nice having her visit, but that I wish I would have had a little more freedom in my schedule. She will stop by for a few hours on Sunday as well, so that should be enjoyable.

NJ came down with a cold on Monday. Golden and I both started showing symptoms Wednesday morning. I really wish there was a good way to keep from getting what NJ gets without avoiding him completely. It is starting to look like we will be getting every bug that hampers kids his age for the next few years.

I completed the two classes I am taking this semester on Monday and Tuesday. I had a harder time committing to this semester than usual, partially because I knew I would have a three-month break after the classes were complete and partially because I did not feel like the summer ended yet.

We trimmed NJ's hair again tonight. That is not really noteworthy other than to say that he did significantly worse this time than last time. He was completely inconsolable for probably fifteen minutes after the haircut was complete. I think the trimmers startled him. I know he didn't trust me for a half hour to an hour after I gave him the cut.

I think that is it. I'll get back to enjoying my first weekend without homework again.

summer trip: day eight

Miles so far: 2072

I now know that I under-calculated the number of miles that we would travel on the trip. I know that it is about eight hundred miles from my parents' house to our house, so it is now looking like a three thousand mile trip.

Also, for as bad as NJ looked on Monday, Tuesday morning he looked a lot better. Now, almost all signs of pox are gone.

Tuesday morning we left around ten for Scranton. We probably would have left sooner, but someone who will remain nameless was a little sluggish that morning.

Under normal circumstances, the trip would have taken five-and-a-half hours. Since we stopped for lunch at an actual restaurant, dealt with some of NJ's digestive problems, and took a scenic tour of the the area around Nescopeck, Pennsylvania, while I insisted that we weren't lost, we arrived at our destination almost eight hours later.

Just about every time Golden has visited the keystone state it has been in the winter in overcast weather. Not only that, but she has visited mostly the areas of the state still reeling from steel and copper mills shutting down decades ago. As a result, she has had a less than stellar opinion of Pennsylvania. Every time she heard someone call it a beautiful state she disagreed with this assessment, though she kept this opinion to herself. This time she got to see some of the more beautiful areas of the state in the summer sun. I believe that her opinion of the state improved.



I did give some thought to what I consider a mountain as I travelled through the Appalachians. I think that because all of the Appalachian mountains that I have seen are covered in trees, I never considered them mountains. I always figured it was the size of the Rockies that made me view them more as mountains than the Appalachians. I now think it is just because the Rockies are rocky. The fact that most Appalachian peaks are tree-covered makes me see them as overgrown hills.

My grandmother and great aunt are staying with my aunt in her house north of Scranton. It is a large farm house away from the population that was probably built around the turn of the twentieth century, which they are currently remodelling. My aunt's grandson and granddaughter are currently also at the house, so there were people everywhere.

The area around the farm house is something that Dwight Schrute would be proud of. I didn't see any beet farms, but I know I must not have been looking closely enough. I schruted it.A big part of the reason that we travelled to Pennsylvania in the first place is so my grandmother could see her great-grandson. She repeatedly expressed her appreciation that we brought NJ to see her. Two problems, though, are that she is having trouble with her memory and NJ would cry any time we tried to hand him to her. He simply would not have someone other than his mom hold him. Even though there was not much more I could do, I feel bad that she didn't get to hold him without him crying.

Around noon today, my aunt took Golden and I to the Teen Challenge adolescent center where my uncle works. Then she took us around Scranton. The Teen Challenge center is very new and is still in the building process. The views from the complex are spectacular, though.The point of going into Scranton was to see if we could find the "Welcome to Scranton" sign from The Office theme. We found a newer sign, but not the old one. I believe I heard that the old one was taken down, but that it might be around somewhere for visitors to see. That information didn't help us any.We got a late start to my parents' home today, which made all of us a bit nervous given how long it took to get there. The trip back was two hours shorter than the trip there, though, since NJ didn't cause much trouble.

After today, I am feeling pretty good. The next two days should be much slower with no excessive travelling, though I do have a few things scheduled. Going at a slower pace is something I am beginning to really appreciate.

summer trip: day six

Miles so far: 1441

So much has happened since last post. Normally, I might dwell on that, but due to complications with my laptop's ability to plug into an Internet connection, I am outside mooching off someone else's wireless connection. Needless to say, I am short on battery power. No taking time to upload pictures for this post, either.

The main reason that Golden and I planned this trip when we did was to go to her cousin's wedding. On the way there we determined that taking NJ into the main service was a bad idea, so I entertained him in the church lobby while the wedding occurred. In this weird turn of events, I met the bride for the first time and had a short conversation right before she walked down the aisle. I'm never sure what to say in those instances.

Last post I complained a little about it not really being a vacation. Actually, Golden's aunt and uncle have done everything in their power to make things comfortable for everyone. Dash would be interested to know that I am now practiced up on ladder golf, which is a game where two golf balls that are tethered together are hurled at a plastic structure containing rungs. Golden's aunt and uncle hosted several rounds of that game.

NJ does not have a fever any more, but he has what looks like a full-blown case of chicken pox. He got vaccinated for it last week, and everything we can find on the vaccine says that the reactions don't occur in most kids, and when they do they are minor. I'd like to see the stats on that, though, because we can't be the only case.

On the way across Ohio to see my sister I took a few back roads to save time and money, thus skipping most of the Ohio turnpike, but hitting every traffic light in every small town along that stretch. I don't recommend that strategy to anyone else.

The last two nights NJ has been horrible come bedtime and has ended up in our bed. We have a policy that he never sleeps in our bed, so you know it had to be bad. Tonight he seems better, and I think that is mostly due to a stabilizing schedule.

I met the guy that my sister has been seeing for the first time yesterday. We talked a lot of history and politics. I think we both enjoyed that.

Today, we went to a state park in the area for a few minutes before deciding that miniature golf would be the most entertaining thing to do. My mom watched NJ while we played. I didn't do so well, but that mattered much less than the fact that we got to do something entertaining without having to worry about NJ.

Tomorrow. we leave for Scranton. To the question from an earlier post, yes, this is the Scranton from The Office. Unfortunately, the show is not filmed in the city, so there is not much to see from the show in Scranton. I'll be visiting my grandmother, though, so I'll have more important things to worry about.

it's all about the boy

My sister visited this weekend. I felt pretty important when she originally made the plans, so I offered to see if I could get someone to babysit NJ for the weekend. I no longer feel as important as NJ appears to be a higher priority than his dad any more.

The plan is for her to visit us first, which she has done, then visit other family and friends in the general area before flying out on Tuesday. In order for her to keep this schedule she needed to rent a car, so she reserved a car at Enterprise to be picked up on Saturday before noon when they closed.

Very late Saturday morning everyone was kind of slowly moving around when I was sent to pick up lunch. As I stepped to my car I vaguely recalled that we had something we had to do that morning. The long and short of it is that I dropped her off at Enterprise as 11:59AM, literally one minute before closing time.

It's always nice to see family, but at this point we all know that the purpose of every visit is for NJ. He's going to get a big head.

fallingwater - christmas pt 3

Before we went to visit my parents my mom asked if I would want to visit Fallingwater, which is a house Frank Lloyd Wright designed in a very rural area of western Pennsylvania, while I was there. Originally, the plan was for my dad to watch NJ and for my mom, my sister, Golden, and myself to go, but my dad had to work, so Golden volunteered to stay back and watch NJ.

Fallingwater was designed as a summer lodge for three adults and no children. The lodge itself is not very large, but it has several patios and is built over a waterfall. As it is a lodge, it is very masculine with stark lines through the design and is made out of materials like limestone and steel. It also feels just a little ahead of it's time because it has a 70s ambiance, though it was designed and built in the 30s.

The idea of the house is to make residents feel outside even when they are inside. The stone floor is supposed to be waxed in a certain way so it looks wet. There is a stairway from the living room to the creek below the structure. Entire walls are made of glass.

We were not allowed to take pictures of the interior of the building, so most of what I have is various angles around the outside.

The visit was a lot of fun, though it was a tad on the cold side. It would probably be enjoyable to visit in the summer some time.

danita

NJ is 139 days old today. That doesn't sound like much of a milestone. It isn't a round number, and only in a baby's first couple of weeks does anyone measure age in days. It is a very serious milestone for me, though.

When people ask me how many siblings I have I always answer that I have one sister. This is not completely true. Less than two months before my second birthday my mom gave birth to my sister Danita. Danita had a lot of medical problems, but I think most of them had to do with her skeletal structure. I do not know many details about that, though. Most of the questions I have asked about her were when I was too young to get into great medical detail.

I don't remember much about Danita. In fact there is a possibility that the memories I do have are somewhat concocted from the few pictures that exist of her. I think the memories are real, but they are too foggy to be sure. I do know that I did not have too much trouble understanding when she died. I think I was too young for the gravity of the situation to bother me.

Danita passed away October 23, 1981, just 139 days after her birth, due to a case pneumonia that the pediatrician was slow to respond to. I have always known that the experience was difficult for my parents, but I never completely thought through how old 139 days really is. Since this is still the infant stage, it doesn't sound like a lot of time to get involved in a child's life. Now that I have NJ I can honestly say that I don't know how I would deal if something similar happened to him.

A little over a year after Danita died my youngest sister was born. She received the middle name "Joy" because my parents didn't know if they would have another child after Danita. For the first time in my life, I think I can appreciate why.

my long weekend

Golden may post on this too. I'm not going too in depth about anything, so if she does post, it will probably have better detail and perspective.

This weekend my sister, Miss Carisma, visited to see NJ for the first time. I suspect that NJ likes his aunt more than he likes his dad, because she did a much better job of calming him down and making him smile than I did.

We picked MC up at the airport on Friday night, and like every day, didn't get started Saturday until late morning. Saturday afternoon we visited the Deanna Rose Children's Farmstead, which is essentially a huge petting zoo where the kid to adult ratio is something like 500 to 1. NJ will probably like this when he is older, but only the adults could enjoy it this time around.

Saturday night we watched Casablanca. While it isn't really what one might consider a Dust movie, I do understand why it is so acclaimed. The storyline is spectacular.

Sunday we took NJ to church, but of course he spent most of the service in the nursery. As I mentioned before, we tried Noodles & Co for the first time for lunch. Most of the day was down time, though. My sister read a lot and I did homework for most of the afternoon. Golden tried to catch up on some sleep.

Sunday night we watched Tristan & Isolde. I expected this to be more of a chick flick than it was, and I actually enjoyed the conclusion of the movie.

Monday, we visited the mall. I got two pairs of jeans and found that my waist size had increased since the last time I bought jeans. Big surprise. We learned that moving between levels at the mall is not nearly as easy with a stroller as it is without one.

The movie of the night on Monday was Madagascar. It was exactly what I expected from the previews. No better, no worse.

Yesterday, we did a little more shopping in the afternoon before I dropped MC off at the airport. The bad news is that the long weekend is over. The good news is that I have already reached the middle of the week and this is my first day back in the office. You know that I will always try to find the positive side of things.

tipped off

Yesterday for lunch we visited Noodles & Company for the first time. It was actually quite good, for a more reasonable price than I would have expected. When we walked through the doors I noticed some instructions posted on how to order. The last step included a comment that the restaurant is a no tipping zone.

There few things that confuse and frustrate me more than the process of tipping. To me, it is the ultimate in passive-aggressiveness in business. I'm expected to pay for something without being given a good description of what the parameters of the expectation are. This is the key. I am more than happy to tip for good service. I just don't like that it is not made clear when a tip is appropriate and how much is a good or bad tip. How much do you tip a barber or a taxi driver or a carhop at Sonic? Should I tip a higher percent if my meal costs less? What do I do if I don't have enough smaller bills?

In my life I have both over and under compensated on my tipping multiple times. The times that I know that I have underpaid have felt much worse than the times I have overpaid. It is worth paying a few extra dollars to not feel like I have shafted someone who needed the money. I have also heard that one of the worst shifts a waiter or waitress can have is Sunday lunch because Christians tend to expect more service and to tip less. I definitely don't want to be a part of that stereotype.

I believe that if a person's largest source of income is through tips, that the business hiring them has a moral obligation to make clear what level of tipping is expected for good service. That way, the people who rely on those tips and who provide good service can have the expectation that they will get the pay that they deserve. Sure, some people will eat out less, but we are talking about moral, not financial, obligations.

I know I would like a more up front system. At least then I won't spend half my meal, or haircut, or taxi ride wondering what type of tip, if any, is expected. I'd pay for that.

voiced concerns

I recently had to interview someone about a large purchase he made that said something about him for class. Mostly out of convenience and the fact that I work with someone who recently purchased an XBox 360 I interviewed a coworker over lunch and recorded the interview.

While I was listening to the recording I remembered that I don't like the sound of my own voice. When I hear my voice it is a little weird because I don't sound that way to myself. I don't think my voice sounds nearly as cheesy as it really does until I hear it externally. Then I am reminded that it sounds eerily like that of a geek or nerd.

When I was young we would crowd myself, my mom, and my sister around a tape recorder and have discussions. I remember thinking then how squeaky my voice was. It has deepened a little since then, but there is still a weird quality that makes it not quite right. I am not sure if it is the tone of my voice, the speed of my voice, the pausing of my voice or all of the above. One thing is for sure, it will be like this for a while. I'm no ventriloquist.

sidetracked - christmas pt 4

On Wednesday between Christmas and New Year's we went to the mall with my cousin, my sister, and her boyfriend. Most of the time at the mall was spent eating rather than shopping, though.

The discussion got into the strength and relevance of individual churches to relay truth, or at least that is my interpretation of where the conversation went. I enjoyed the conversation, but I did notice that I occasionally lost track of what I was trying to say when I spoke. Because of this I discovered something about myself that I did not like, but that Golden enthusiastically verified. I have a horrible tendency to ramble and go down irrelevant paths in my conversations when I don't know the right words to relay my point. I didn't totally dominate the conversations, but I probably spoke the most of anyone there due of this problem.

As a stupid example, if someone asked me whether I like reality shows I might say something like the following.

"Yes, I do. Well, not all of them. I like reality shows because they give insight into how people think. Some don't though. I like trying to figure out how people think because I don't tend to think like most other people, so their logic doesn't follow the same steps that mine does. Oh yeah, back to whether I like reality shows. I like the Amazing Race because it tests people's abilities more than popularity. That is the problem that I have with Survivor. I do like Survivor too, though, because people's personalities come out in that show. I don't usually watch Wife Swap or Fear Factor, but I don't know all the reasons why. I can explain my feelings about American Idol more clearly, though. I think... "

Exhausted yet?

the graduate

This weekend we went to Springfield to see Ms Carisma's (my sister) graduation from MSU, which was formerly SMSU. She was to get her MBA. I was going to get to see family, which was a little exciting, but I was also going to have to sit through a graduation, which was less exciting. I have sat through three graduations so far at Evangel and I remembered three hour long ceremonies that seemed to drag on forever.

The graduation was in the arena where basketball games are held. There were chairs set up for graduates on the court, and the rest of the seating was first come first served. We showed up early enough to get seats near mid-court three rows up.

The ceremony was for business and education graduates, and apparently a few stranglers from other programs. I counted 600 in all. Given my past experiences I was ready for a long ceremony.

Ms Carisma was one of the first students to walk into the arena and so was about the fifth or sixth of the six hundred there to have her name called and receive her hood. She sat on the front row, which I found kind of humorous because she had commented that she would have to do her best to stay awake. You can't hide that you are sleeping on the front row.

The main speaker was relatively humorous and gave a speech that probably was better directed toward me than toward my sister. The main gist of it could be summarized by the statement, "Be skeptical rather than cynical because cynicism is laziness." He probably spoke for twenty minutes.

When names started getting read off I noticed that there were two people reading names. Graduates walked to podiums on either side of the court and so it essentially doubled the speed of reading off the graduates and having them come up. At Evangel, the process easily took 30-45 minutes. I think the entire process at Friday's graduation took 15 minutes.

Within 65 minutes of the start of the ceremony it was complete. We almost waited for a table at the Outback longer than the actual graduation ceremony took. This improved my opinion of the situation tremendously. It was nice to get time to talk to and eat with family afterwards.

I have two closing thoughts. First, why do institutions of higher learning bother with an alma mater song? They are always real hokey. Second, now I am the least educated between me and my sister. I hope it don't show.