A few weeks ago I was flipping through channels and I came across the Tyra Banks show. Generally, this is not a show that would hold my interest for more than three seconds, but the description of this episode kept me watching. Apparently Ms. Banks was going to put on a fat suit that was going to make her look 200 pounds heavier in a less-than-flattering way and walk around in a few public places. I must confess that I expected some morbid pleasure out of seeing a former supermodel treated less than fairly. A very evil side of me figured that Tyra would get her just desserts for helping to propogate an unhealthy image of what beauty is.
Within a few seconds of her walking down the street the camera showed three women chuckling condescendingly as they passed her. As she walked into a store she generally got equally bad treatment. The cameras then followed her on three blind dates where two guys had a hard time being geniunely congenial, but a third was at least outwardly kind.
Tyra's reaction to her treatment was pretty harsh. She railed against some of the comments that were made and she cried with some of her guests about the treatment that she received. She also displayed shock about some of what she saw and experienced.
I must confess that I am not always perfect. I sometimes treat people badly for stupid reasons. I think everyone does, but that is hardly a good excuse. I have even made negative comments about others' appearances before, but appearance never had anything to do with why I made the comments (as if that mattered). I have never been able to understand why some people mistreat others specifically because of their appearance. In watching Tyra's show, though, I think I have come to understand the meanness a little more.
The key to my confusion has always been empathy. How can people be so heartless when they see how much they hurt others? In some cases, I know that certain evil people really do get some sick pleasure out of hurting others, but this has to be a minority of the cases. I think the majority of it is that people are generally only as nice as their empathy demands. It is easy to be kind to people when you can put yourself in their shoes but if you can't the natural reaction is to think less of the person who isn't like you. Tyra was shocked by the behavior simply because she had not yet tried to walk in a larger person's shoes. Had she gone through similar torment for other stupid reasons earlier in life I don't think that she would have been so surprised. Likewise, had the people who laughed at her been able to empathize with the pain they might cause perhaps they would have reacted differently.
I think could be part of what Jesus was talking about when he said that even tax collectors love those who love them. It makes me wonder if I can't fully understand the love I am expected to portray until I do something like what Tyra did. Should I keep from grooming myself for a week to understand with humility how people treat the homeless? Should I don a fat suit as well to understand with humility how someone 200 pounds heavier than myself would be treated? I hope and pray that I am not so vain that such steps are necessary. God will have to help me figure that out.
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2 comments:
I am at fault for this. I make fun of people in secret along with friends, yet if i knew the pain it caused I would not.
Tyra is not your typical waif supermodel.
When I was a kid I remember doing that sort of thing then realizing how wrong it was when people did it to me. Because of this realization I was careful not to talk about people like that, so I thought I was immune.
I have since learned that this is unfortunately something that I need to continually work on.
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