buhhh dee

When I was younger I remember adults using nicknames for me like "champ" or "sport" or "bud" or something of that nature. This did two things. First, I assume the names were meant to be somewhat endearing. Second, and most important, the names asserted that I held a diminutive role in that relationship. This was not a big deal when I was a kid. In fact, I use "kiddo" with NJ now because my dad used that phrase with me. That name didn't bother me, so I figure it won't bother NJ. As I have grown up, though, I have become more and more annoyed at the people who use these terms with me. It does not happen real often, but there are not many situations where it doesn't bother me when it does occur.

I have noticed that people who are significantly taller or more athletic than me are likely to refer to me with a name like "bud." I should probably consider that a good thing, since it is short for "buddy," but I always get the feeling that the word is meant to be used in a mildly patronizing way. I can't think of a scenario where guys who see each other as equals refer to each other as "bud" so long as that is not one of their first names. Maybe "dude," but not "bud."

A few months ago some girl cashier who couldn't have been older than me referred to me as "hon" in the same way I might expect a woman in her sixties to do so. Again, this bothered me a little because to me that is a term that in my mind is used in a grandmotherly or motherly manner. It is not something I expect to hear from a cashier who is my age. I know it's a minor issue, but it stuck out.

Let me clarify that most of my frustration comes from the fact that I simply dislike people whom I consider equals using terms that I think put the speaker on some sort of higher plane from the audience (me). Generally speaking, the terms are fine for people much older than me because they have more life experience, wisdom, etc. I just don't like being called "champ" by someone who graduated after I did.

I am also a little uncomfortable with terms that put people at a lower level than me, such as "sir." That is a little different, though, because the person choosing to use the word is not putting himself or herself on a higher level than someone else. Most of the reason I even care about this is that I have this feeling that the people who like to be called "sir" are the ones who really do believe they are better than those who are serving them.

I can already hear the first question people are likely to ask. What should people call me if they forget my name, or don't know it, for whatever reason? I have always responded to, "Hey you!" Failing that, though, you can call me Dust Prime.

medicine head

I took some Benadryl last night to alleviate my allergies and it left me groggy for the entire night. I napped for a little bit and my mind was in a fog for the rest of the night. Golden recommended I try something that wouldn't knock me out, but I did not figure it would have the impact that it did on me.

If I don't expect to go to bed early on a given day or night, there is very little more annoying than when my mind is not working properly. I can go through the motions of reading and hearing words or seeing things, but my mind has to work very hard to process them. It's almost like the words aren't there. It is sometimes bad enough that I cannot meanfully interact with my environment. Eventually I get tired, give up, and go to bed.

Sometimes I can combat the grogginess by walking around or getting a cold drink of water, and that can help me gather my thoughts temporarily. Eventually, I return to my previous state, though.

When I am tired and foggy the quality of my work suffers too. I don't spend the time on it that it deserves, so mistakes get through and the end result is often incomplete. Kind of like this post.

angel's advocate

Someone pointed out at work last week that I like to take a contrarian position a lot, but it is often to make excuses for other people. If someone complains about someone else, I am likely to point out some possibility that could excuse the problem behavior. For example, if someone complains that someone else from a different time zone scheduled a meeting during lunch I will note that maybe this is the only time they have available. Because of this tendency, I was informed that I should be called an angel's advocate rather than a devil's advocate.

At first, this sounds great. It sounds like I am an open-minded person who wants to give people a fair shake. After I started thinking about it, though, this is probably not as true as I would like. I make flash judgments and gripe about other people doing inconsiderate things as much as anyone else. This makes me doubt that my angel's advocate tendencies are completely noble.

I have a few theories about why I like to make excuses for other people. The truth is probably some combination of my theories.

• I might be psychologically trying to atone for the times that I prejudge others' motives. If I can convince myself that I go out of my way to verify motives before making a judgment, then I can forgive myself easier in those times when I quickly judge someone as a jerk.
• I may be trying to encourage other people to not judge me too quickly.
• It might be that I am an objective person if I am not the person who feels like he is getting screwed.
• I might have some serious psychological issue whereby I feel I have to disagree with people.
• I may be trying to prove to other people that I can consider all possible scenarios in a confusing situation. In other words, I might be trying to prove that I am intelligent person who doesn't succumb to knee-jerk responses.
• I might just have an inability to avoid saying whatever random things enter my head around certain people.

At the very least, this has allowed me an opportunity to grow. If I am not playing the angel's advocate for the right reasons, I might ought to stop playing that role so often.

finally better

Just about every time there is a cold going around I seem to get it. This last bout actually started with NJ over two weeks ago, then went to Golden, then went to me. I am just now getting over it.

NJ has been sick before, so this wasn't the first time we've dealt with illness as parents, but since the whole process of someone in the house not feeling good has stretched out for so long and because this was more powerful than the typical cold, it has felt like the last two weeks was training for all the future illnesses that he will bring into the house. I know from watching other families with kids that sickness is common if not nearly constant in a lot of homes.

I don't have anything deeper than this, especially because I don't expect that most people will be checking blogs over Memorial Day weekend. In case you need something further, below are some pictures of NJ from the last couple of months.

what do you want?

Throughout the past couple of years I have tried several different types of posts. Some have been successful and some haven't. A lot of this has been influenced by the amount of time that I might have at any given point to devote to a post and by trends in the blogs. In spite of this, I figure I may be able to increase the proportion of successful posts if I get some feedback.

This is a call out to anyone who reads this with any regularity. I am more than happy to hear what types of posts you do and don't like. What would you like to see that you haven't and what are you sick of seeing?

The reason I am asking is that I have found that I am not spectacular at predicting the specifics of what other people like. The response that I have received from specific posts in the past has not necessarily lined up with how I would have ranked them on my own. It is important to note that this is not meant to provide me a pat on the back, so you can be brutally honest about what you don't like.

Obviously, this is just a request for those who want to provide feedback. I am not trying to obligate anyone, just get an idea of what people like and dislike the most. In the end I am going to post what I like and know, but I am more likely to devote real time to a post that I know somebody will probably like than to one that I am unsure about.

the worst

BB did something like this recently, but I would like to think this is a slightly different take. RottenTomatoes.com recently created a list of the one hundred worst movies that they have ranked. These are generally movies from the last eight to ten years and the rankings are based on tallies from movie reviewers, so this is not by any means a definitive list.

I have not seen most of the movies in the list, but I have included my opinions of some that I have seen below.

Elektra (89 of 100)
We actually got Elektra because Golden wanted to see it. I was hesitant because I knew the word on the street was that it was pretty bad. Actually, it was quite entertaining if somewhat shallow. I might be saying that because I never read the Elektra comic books, though, so I didn't have expectations.

Darkness Falls (87 of 100)
Darkness Falls wasn't absolutely horrible, but it was incredibly predictable. The main appeal to me of horror movies is not the scariness involved, but the fact that I have to try to figure out what is going on. Predictable horror movies take that appeal away.

The final scene where the main character must face down the object of his lifelong fear is rather cool. It's just easy to tell what is going to happen.

The New Guy (69 of 100)
The New Guy was genuinely bad. It was everything that is bad about a typical teen movie. The concept of the movie, that a nerd could learn how to be cool and start a new life at a new high school, had promise, but the actual story was dumb, dumb, dumb.

I will say that I have probably seen dumber kiddie-teen movies. I can't think of any right now, but I must have.

Ultraviolet (63 of 100)
I went into Ultraviolet expecting it to be unrealistic. I don't think it ever had the pretense of being a serious movie. Since I got the idea that the movie was not taking itself seriously I didn't take it seriously and just enjoyed the ridiculously unrealistic fight scenes. I think it is easier to enjoy a bad movie when it seemingly acknowledges its badness rather than tries to take itself too seriously.

Stay Alive (60 of 100)
Formulaic. Could tell when everyone was going to die. Didn't make complete sense. Very cheesy. I would have watched it anyway had I had it to do over again, though, because I enjoyed the idea of people getting sucked into a video game world. It didn't hurt that I thought that the video game world they were sucked into was cool.

Envy (54 of 100)
Envy was another of Golden's picks that I was leery about. My concern was that I would see too much of myself in Ben Stiller's character. When I actually watched the movie I found that my concerns were unfounded. The humor in the movie was not the least bit subtle, but it probably doesn't deserve to be on a "Worst" list. Instead, put it on a "Stereotypical Ben Stiller or Jack Black Movie" list.

The Fog (42 of 100)
I had a hard time caring enough about The Fog to follow it. I do not plan on watching the original, though I hear it is a little more interesting than this one.

Fear Dot Com (23 of 100)
I knew better than to watch this insipid movie. The main appeal of Fear Dot Com was the haunting cover art on the DVD case. This is an unbelievably stupid reason to watch a movie under normal circumstances. When the DVD is mailed to me without a case it borders on lunacy. The movie made absolutely no sense, so I learned my lesson for at least a couple of months.

Battlefield Earth (14 of 100)
I know this is a brainless science fiction movie strongly influenced by L. Ron Hubbard's beliefs, but it is first and foremost a brainless science fiction movie. I will not be watching it again, but I do not regret making the choice to rent it when I did. It was widely canned and derided, so I don't feel like my watching it somehow helped Scientology in any way.

The Master of Disguise (9 of 100)
When even the commercial for a "comedy" doesn't contain anything particularly funny that is a bad sign. As we were leaving the theater (yes, we saw this in a theater) I heard someone say that it was the worst movie he had ever seen. I wouldn't say that. I would say that it was the worst comedy I had ever seen. That still says a lot.

Alone in the Dark (2 of 100)
I did not realize that Alone in the Dark was going to be such a bad movie. I did not investigate the movie, though, so had I realized that Tara Reid was cast as a scientist, this may have tipped me off. I have been waffling between whether I have seen worse movies or not. There are movies that were more unpleasant to watch, but those were still nearly all higher quality than this movie. Regardless, this movie does deserve to be where it is on the list.

I won't say what movie was ranked at number one, but you can find it here. I haven't seen that movie and I don't really intend to.

I have a few thoughts about this list (meaning the complete list and not the one above). There were a few actors who showed up quite a bit on the list. For example Tim Allen, Freddie Prinze, and Cuba Gooding Jr. are prominently featured. The first two I understand, but I would have thought that Mr. Gooding Jr. would be able to get better roles.

Also, I have been watching The Day After Tomorrow as I have been typing this. Politics aside, that movie belongs on the list as much as several of the ones above. The only thing saving it is the spectacular special effects. At least that is the one thing that supporters of the movie keep pointing to. It is possible that the movie is intended to be campy, but the campiness feels unintentional to me.

What about you? Do you see movies on the list that you agree or disagree with? Are there movies you think should be on the list, especially from the last ten years?

bless you, here's a pranky

On Saturday one of the letters I got in the mail had the following printed on the envelope. I would find out later at church that I was not the only one who received the letter, and that my impression of the letter was more or less the same as most everyone else.

"God's Holy Spirit instructed us to loan you this to start turning things around for you. So, here it is."

I had two immediate thoughts. First, I thought that this should be entertaining. Second, I concluded that I didn't need to think any more about what I would be posting on Monday. My opinion is that for most people this will either be very entertaining because of how crazy it is or it will be incredibly boring.

When I opened the envelope looking for some hokey stuff the contents did not disappoint. The first thing I saw was a blurry picture of Jesus in clouds, arms outstretched, next to text that informed me that I should not read the sealed prophecies until I returned a "prayer page" and "prayer handkerchief" (henceforth called the "pranky") in the envelope that was enclosed.

The instructions on the prayer page made several references to Acts 19:11-12 as proof that God wanted the recipient (in this case, me) to send back the pranky. The steps I was to follow were quite a bit more specific than the passage in Acts, but I was assured that this is what the Holy Spirit had instructed.

• I was to write my name and the name of someone who needs God's assistance in the middle of the pranky.
• I was to open my Bible to the passage in Acts.
• I was to lay the pranky on that passage. God apparently works by osmosis.
• I was to leave my Bible and pranky under the side of my bed for the night. I guess the smell of old shoes doesn't impact the process.
• I was to mail the pranky back immediately in the morning with the letter containing a list of things that I might like God to do for me and a line stating what type of "seed gift" I am giving to "God's work."
• I was to wait until I mailed all this stuff before I read my sealed prophecy.
• This was not technically a step, but both Matthew 9:29 and Mark 10:27 were both quoted to add extra assurance that this is what God wanted me to do.

I cheated and opened the sealed prophecies. The general points are listed below and my comments are italicized.

• The prophetic words are from the Holy Spirit Himself. Of course, this assertion is a large part of why I am being merciless with this mailer.
• I have a greater purpose than I have discovered. I agree. Care to elaborate, though?
• I am currently facing a decision. I am always facing a decision. Actually, of all the times in the last fifteen years my life, this is probably one of the ones where I am facing the fewest major, life-altering decisions.
• I need to set new goals in life because I am apathetic. I would guess this describes most people, but this is probably accurate.
• I have the power in me to speak blessings into my life. This sounds more like something Shirley McClaine might say than the Holy Spirit. God blesses. I don't.
• I may feel inner power growing because of my closeness to the Holy Spirit. Okay, this is about as big and bright as a red flag gets. I don't believe the Holy Spirit ever needs to use the word "may" unless He is describing a month.
• God will direct my steps. True, but I shouldn't need to mail any prankies anywhere for that to happen.


• I will be blessed as I am faithful in sowing seed into God's kingdom. Send money.

I know everyone reading this is intelligent enough to see through this charade, but I do want to detail what bothers me about this mailer.

• The "ministry" consists of a post office box, two phone numbers, and a millionaire in California. I am sure he got his money because he sent a pranky to someone else.
• Anyone who claims to relay what the Holy Spirit is saying better truly be relaying what the Holy Spirit is saying. I will go out on a limb and say that this church-cliché-ridden mass mailer is not word for word from the Holy Spirit.
• Apparently, this "ministry" targets—I mean, blesses—poor people.
• Rather than do something that draws people toward God, this "ministry" essentially pushes two groups of people away from God. First, those who believe in what this mailer is saying are encouraged to believe that God expects a defined set of steps to be closer to Him. God wants a relationship with people, not an instruction manual. Second, cynics who see Christianity as the realm of scammers and idiots have to get that idea from somewhere.
• I believe that the furthest you can be from God is to exploit through falsehoods others' desire to have faith for your own personal gain. I don't know how all sins stack up, but I cannot imagine many being much worse.

baby einstein

NJ has several videos from the Baby Einstein collection. Depending on the video, the majority of the content is toys, puppets, and kids doing things to music. There is generally a theme as well, such as art or learning how to use some sign language.

Very typically a Baby Einstein DVD will be started on "Repeat Play" and we'll let it run through a few times before turning it off. NJ will occasionally pay attention, but he does not typically just sit there and watch the video.

I was thinking earlier today (well, technically yesterday) that I probably notice that the video is playing more often than NJ does. I have to say that the first few times through the videos isn't bad, but at some point the brain starts turning to mush. I think I reached that point today.

I hope he doesn't grow to like Barney. If so, I might have an aneurysm. Or my brain could turn to grits.

merger

One of the guys at work grew up on the West Coast and often points out things that are different between there and the Midwest. A frequent topic and the basis for a recent discussion is regarding driving habits between the two places. We specifically discussed (meaning that we hotly debated) the ways traffic merges in both places when lanes are closed and what truly is the best way to handle this.

Apparently, the Kansas way is for everyone to merge as soon as they see the "Lane Closed" sign and to get real mad at people who drive all the way to the cones then try to merge. Apparently, the California way is to drive all the way to where the lane ends, then for the traffic in the lane that is going away to merge every other car. I have talked to people on both sides of this issue who get very frustrated at those who prefer to merge different than them because they are convinced everyone else is screwing everything up.

If this is indeed how things work in each locale, I have a theory about why this is. This should interest BB since it has to do with standing in line for a $35 shirt. There are several places where overpriced shirts are sold, but I would like to focus on two of them for the purpose of my example.

If I were to go to the t-shirt stand at most concerts right before the concert started, I would probably have to fight a crowd to purchase a shirt. There would be no lines because there would not be enough room for lines. There really wouldn't be such a thing as cutting because the entire system relies on people elbowing their way to the counter. You snooze you loose.

If I were to buy a shirt at a retail store I would probably have to stand in one of several lines and eventually purchase the shirt at a register. Getting in line at a register that is shut down then cutting in the line at the next register would generally be frowned upon. This system would work because the store has more room for people to line up than exists in front of the shirt stand.

I say this without having driven in California, but I think that driving in the more populated areas of California is like trying to get to the counter at the t-shirt stand at a concert. There is so much traffic in such a confined area that you can't as easily fault someone for cutting you off. This sort of system would encourage people to wait until the last possible moment to merge because why not speed past three or four or forty other cars before merging if you are going to have to force your way in no matter what anyway?

I think that driving in Kansas is like standing line at a retail store. There is less traffic for the amount of roadway we have. When drivers pass up opportunities to merge into gaps in the traffic and instead cut someone off at the last possible moment so they can get further ahead the other drivers think they are jerks. It is like someone just cut in line in front of them.

This is just a theory. I think it would be a cool psychological study to see if people from one area of the United States change their driving habits when they move. I would almost think a person would have to in order to survive. That is probably a good reason not to consider moving to Los Angeles. I know I would hate the traffic.

sore thumb

My general goal for maintaining our property isn't for it to look spectacular. It is just to not be the worst looking property in the neighborhood. I don't want to stick out like a sore thumb.

For example, with all the rain that we have had every house in my general neighborhood has been mowed recently with one exception. One house about two blocks from mine has grass that is probably eight or ten inches high. Since pretty much everyone else in the area mowed this past weekend, that yard looks hilariously out of place. I don't want to be the owner of that house.

As another example, one of our next door neighbors rents out his house. The last tenant just left a couple of weeks ago. Apparently that tenant did not tell her landlord that she got a letter stating that garbage is only picked up once a week now. There has been a large yellow garbage bag out by the curb since Sunday. It isn't an eyesore, but it is like a big flashing sign to the rest of the neighborhood that says, "I have no idea when garbage pickup is." I don't want to be the owner of that house.

After thinking this through, though, I might have a change of heart. I think I wouldn't mind ignoring the lawn and putting the garbage out whenever it is convenient for me. If I can just get past the embarrassment of having the most mismanaged property in the area, I could be even more lazy. Maybe it's worth letting my house look like that after all.

who let the dogs out?

Generally, when I have done my doctor-prescribed walking I have done at least part of it with Golden and NJ. We strap him into the stroller and parade around the neighborhood. It must be a sight.

Since NJ has been sick the past few days my Friday and Saturday walks were by myself. On Friday, being alone meant that I walked further than I normally would and staked out what I thought was a good path that wound through the neighborhood for those days when I want to cover more ground than usual.

Saturday I headed on a variation of this path when I noticed a large dog running loose about half a block in front of me with its owner trying to catch it. This dog had barked at me the previous day so I figured it did not like something about me. I turned around and decided it wasn't a big deal if I trim that couple of blocks from my walk.

After about ten minutes I had gotten back on my planned path when I noticed an open gate to the back yard of a house I was just then stepping in front of. A lot of people were mowing at the time, so this was not the first house with an open gate that I had passed, but I was a little jumpy. I had good reason to be. There was a truck in the driveway of the house and once I stepped past it I noticed another large and unleashed dog that had been obscured by the truck and was standing in the house's front yard. Fortunately, it was distracted by something and was looking elsewhere.

Let me stop here to note that this was not a terrifying situation. This was not a huge dog, but simply a good-sized dog. It was not big enough to fear, but it was big enough to respect. I concluded that I would not to cross its path because I was not sure if this particular dog knew the difference between the smell of fear and the smell of respect, and I am decidedly not confrontational with animals who have teeth named after them.

Normally, this would just be an annoyance. I understand that dogs sometimes find ways of breaking out of houses and back yards and I am normally not concerned about getting attacked by a dog. Since I often take NJ on my walks, though, this gave me some pause. I am going to have to tread a little more cautiously when he is with me.

lucky me

Golden has overall more traditional views than I do regarding what men and women are responsible for in the family. I could be more traditional than I think, though, because Golden spoils me quite a bit.

One of the guys at work pointed out this week how traditional my situation is because Golden prepares my lunch, takes care of my clothes, does most of the baby care, gets me up in the morning, etc. I have known for a while that I am fortunate that all these things are taken care of for me, but I was inspired to start thinking about it again. I hope this is not the case, but I may be saying that I don't expect my wife to take on traditional gender roles in part because I know that Golden will voluntarily step into that role.

I have long believed that the roles in a relationship should be fairly discussed and established by both people in the relationship. That is easy for me to believe when Golden volunteers for some of the things I don't want to deal with, though.

Thanks, Golden, for taking care of both NJ and me and being a great wife and mother. NJ and I don't know how good we have it. Have a happy Mother's Day. You deserve it.

2107

A discussion came up in my office about what life will be like in one hundred years. Wouldn't it be cool to go ahead into the future and see what advances have been made and what changes have occurred in society? After giving this some thought, though, I have to question whether I want to know what the distant future will be like.

To understand how I may react to civilization in the future, I have to consider how people in the past might react if they were brought to the present. I have been through this line of thinking before, and I generally conclude that most people from one or two hundred years ago would have a very hard time with the current state of things. This is not because the current society is any worse than previous societies, but because things are very different and because the road here has not been without bumps.

Just imagine being relatively young in 1907 and finding out that the United States would fight in two world wars, go through an extended depression, be completely changed through a cultural revolution, and experience heightened security concerns from nuclear proliferation in a cold war followed by attacks from Muslim extremists. I think that would be scary. Sure, maybe the person from 1907 would be encouraged by improvements in medical science, communications, transportation, and so forth, but I don't know that the good would outweigh the bad in his or her perspective.

If a third world war was going to occur, I don't think I would want to know the details before they happened. If there were another depression, the only warning I would really want would be enough to pull out of the market before it crashed. If there were a pandemic of some disease I would only want enough warning to get my family inoculated in time.

So, if you are a time traveller from the future only tell me the good things.

my very efficient sentences

I have always enjoyed Astronomy, probably more than any other field in the sciences. As a result I never really needed a mnemonic to remember the planets. I was enough of a geek that I cared about the planets enough to memorize them without study tricks. Therefore, even though I knew there was a sentence that people used to remember the planets, I didn't know what the sentence was.

Someone at work recently pointed out to me that the sentence no longer works. Apparently, the standard planet mnemonic sentence was, "My Very Efficient Mother Just Sent Us Nine Pizzas," with the first letter of each word representing the next planet. Now that Pluto is not considered a planet, the sentence becomes quite cryptic and perhaps unusable. So, I am trying my hand at a new mnemonic that could help the kids of the future remember the planets. That is, until we find out that Neptune doesn't count as a planet any more either.

• Master's Vile Enemies May Judo Several Unhappy Ninjas.
• Maybe Vinegar Elevates My Judgment Somewhat Under Nice.
• Men Vehemently Eat Much Junk Saving Usually Nothing.
• Many Vampires Even Mull Joyriding Silently Until Night.
• Mark Veritably Enjoys Midnights Just Sketching Unfinished Notes.
• Mavens' Valuable Elegance Might Just Stop Unfounded Nastiness.

I didn't pull out the thesaurus until the fifth sentence. My sentences may not be perfect, but at least they are not about receiving nine pizzas.

free will

From The Matrix.

Morpheus: "Do you believe in fate, Neo?"
Neo: "No."
Morpheus: "Why not?"
Neo: "Because I don't like the idea that I'm not in control of my life."

This weekend Golden and I watched Stranger than Fiction. The premise is that the main character's life is narrated and dictated by a female voice in his head. Whatever the voice says about him happens, and it completely disarms him when the voice comments on his impending death. The rest of the movie involves this protagonist's search for the source of the voice, as that voice controls his life more than he does.

After watching the movie I started thinking about the level of free will that we have in our own lives. I have always disdained any notion that I do not make my own decisions. I very much follow Neo's thinking from The Matrix that the idea that I am not the one making the decisions for my life feels wrong. I think that if I were to succumb to even a mild variation of a belief in fate, I would be removing my humanity from the equation. I would be little more than a trained pet.

While predestination might be an apt topic for thought here, my perspective at the moment is far broader than irresistible grace. The real question in my mind is how much control do people have over the decisions they make? How much of personality is under our own control? Can we at all influence our human condition?

Since I am similar to Neo, even with this line of questioning, I am naturally drawn to a worldview that provides me with nearly complete control of my life. If anyone is going to be able to destroy my life or determine who controls my life, I have to believe I will be that person. Perhaps I have no choice but to believe in free will.

psychologically pleasing smells

Today, I had to go to the office for our cable company and switch out our cable box, which had been acting up. When I stepped inside I remembered why I like my visits to the cable company. It smells real nice.

I have mentioned before that I have a strong sense of smell, so I believe that a lot of smells affect me more for better or worse than others. My experience is that a lot of smells have been designed to stir up a psychological reaction. For example, who can resist the allure of the new car smell and the general feeling of newness and excitement that accompanies it? Who can resist the draw of smoked meat outside a BBQ restaurant? Our cable company's local office has a different smell, though. It smells like a hotel lobby.

I have always gotten excited about the opportunity to stay in a hotel, even when I was very young. I think it's because I can be shut off from my typical world with access to cable TV and no real responsibilities other than getting some ice. When I was younger, I probably associated it with getting to swim in an indoor pool as well. When I get a whiff of a typical hotel lobby smell it instantly makes me just a little bit happier than I am because of the psychological excitement I get out of going to a hotel. It's probably stronger for me than the new car smell or the BBQ restaurant smell.

This all makes me wonder why more businesses do not integrate psychologically pleasing smells into their places of business. It would make me visit more often.

creative resolve

I have to assume that most people who have gone through years of school and taken many tests have had at least a few moments of panic in a test. I am talking about those instances where a person realizes he or she doesn't remember some of the content being tested at all. I had one of those moments recently.

In one of my classes the tests are split 50/50 between short answer and multiple choice questions. I started the short answer questions when I realized that I did not remember the material for nearly half the short answer questions. As usual, I went through the following emotions.

• Panic: How can this be happening to me?
• Denial: If I just sit here and think about it I'm sure I can figure it out.
• Frustration: I can't figure it out. What do I do?
• Distraction: I'll work on a different part of the test and come back.
• Panic (again): Aaaagh, I still don't know what to do!
• Creative Resolve: I guess I'll have to make something up that sounds good.

I am convinced that the main difference between a typical A student and a typical B or C student is how well he or she does in the Creative Resolve stage. If the student never gets out of panic mode or simply does not do a good job making things up that does not bode well. I have included a few rules I follow when I am in the Creative Resolve stage.

Rule #1 (Short Answer): Only give away necessary information.

The best way to do this is to restate the material in the question. Only when necessary should additional information that is not in the question be introduced. This is illustrated below

Example Question: What was the Industrial Revolution?
Wrong Answer: The Industrial Revolution marked a change in technological, sociological, cultural, and political conditions near the beginning of the nineteenth century.
Right Answer: The Industrial Revolution was a period of great change in trade and manufacturing.

The wrong answer included facts, which are easy to get wrong (types of conditions of change, when it occurred). The right answer simply regurgitated the definitions of the words "industrial" and "revolution." It answers the question but contains no potential gotchas.

Rule #2 (Short Answer): If a list is required, bury the answers you aren't sure of.

Graders are human and humans are often lazy. It is completely possible the gaffe will be entirely missed if it is the sixth item in a long list.

Example: List the continents.

• North America
• South America
• Europe
• Asia
• Africa
• Antacid
• Australia

Rule #3 (Short Answer): Make reference to material from lecture or the text if it sounds even remotely relevant.

This especially works if it is some inane fact or example that proves you remember some material from the class. I regularly reference examples from the class that sound relevant to the question, but aren't really.

Rule #4 (Multiple Choice): Think twice before selecting "A."

The first multiple choice option is usually the one the test writer picks as the place to winnow out the students who won't read all the options. It usually sounds the best of all the wrong answers and yet is usually still wrong.

Rule #5 (True/False): Absolutes are gimmes.

Almost any time a true/false question uses the words "all" or "always" or "none" or "never" the answer is false. This almost always (heh) signals that an there is an exception that needs to be considered.

Example: True or false? All Kansans were born in Kansas?

Those are my rules. Do you have any?

living with rejection

A few months ago I decided that we need to get a rewards card to recoup at least some of the money we spend in everyday life. As a result, I investigated different cards and found one that I felt matched our needs the best. I figured we would make most of our bill payments and purchases on the card and just pay it off every month. Reasonable strategy, I think.

It appears the credit card company figured out my strategy. I recently received a letter stating that because I don't have any revolving accounts with a balance my request for credit has been rejected. This is the first time I have ever been rejected for credit. I wouldn't apply for a card that I didn't plan to use, so I have to assume the problem is that the evidence suggests that I will be paying my balance in full every month.

I actually understand this to some degree, so I am not really complaining so much. If this is a standard policy for all banks, though, I may have trouble getting a good rewards card.