As most people reading this blog know, Golden and I went to her grandfather's funeral this week. There were different things that I could comment on the proceedings that stuck out to me like the great volume of people who went to his viewing, the fact that the service was performed outdoors in February, or that family politics is always very intriguing to watch. What stuck out to me the most was that many people had a different portrait in their minds of this man than I did.
Through the past two days I have determined that you can tell a lot about how close a person was to the deceased by what good things they choose to say about him or her. In this case one of the most accurate that I heard was that he was a very giving person. He was very giving. He was also a very nice person to get to know. I didn't hear that one quite so much. Interestingly, it seemed to me that some people chose at random what good traits to apply to him, though, because some did not really apply. I am not saying that he was a bad person, but he was human and everyone is lacking in some positive traits.
I feel it is only fair to use myself as an example. If anyone uses any of the following to describe me after my death, I will have either changed greatly or that person will not have known the true me very well.
- He was always selflessly giving
- He never said "I told you so"
- He never failed God
- He always had his priorities right
- He put others ahead of himself
8 comments:
I like that idea! I'm with you, I'd rather have bad truth to a good lie, and yes...the whole speaker thing would be too much truth! But I guess if we're dead then we wouldn't be the ones dealing with it!
* He was always selflessly giving
* He never said "I told you so"
* He never failed God
* He always had his priorities right
* He put others ahead of himself
I think all of us fail to meet those requirements. Therefore, what good can be said?
Good to be said:
*He only said I told you so, when he indeed had told you so!
*He gave, even when it wasn't selflessly.
*He didn't always fail God.
*Sometimes he got his priorities right.
*He didn't always put himself first.
Sorry T. I meant that more as a statement than a question, but those are good responses anyway.
I was just stating that with the conviction that I am not good and I am a sinner and that all my good deeds, my righteousness is but dirty rags, and that I will not be complete until I am with Him.
Forrst, I definitely understand your point. I think, though, that with some people you can say that they understood sacrifice or that they usually put others before themselves or something like that.
Everybody, I understand what you are saying. "YES, YOU CAN SAY GOOD THINGS ABOUT PEOPLE." You don't need to convice me of this. I am just saying that when people are honest and look at their life they probably see a lot they don't like. Yes, people may think they sacrifice and put other first, but they still probably struggle with selfish desire.
I dunno, I think I understand someone saying "he always" as "I choose to remember this person as being identified by...." Always and never rarely apply...but if someone uses them I take it to be appropriate hyperbole about a perception of truth and not a factual truth.
"You never put away your laundry" is probably not defensible in a court of law...but I would understand that as my wife saying you have a habit or pattern that noticably sticks out.
It would probably be defensible in a court of law when applied to me. :)
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