For the first few years that Golden and I were married I felt like people who had kids did everything they could to make sure I understood the lack of responsibilities life is without kids. For example, if I asked someone with kids if they had seen a specific movie in a theater, that person might mention that he or she doesn't go to movies any more because of his or her kids. I was never too annoyed about this because I always figured that I would do the same thing when I had kids. In a very unsurprising development, I do the same thing to people without kids now that we have NJ.
Now, when someone asks me about whether I have been somewhere like an amusement park or to a movie or some other random thing I don't just reply with a "no." I have to make a point that life with a one-year-old does not allow for many diversions.
For the year or two before NJ was born we did not really go out much anyway, but after he was born our mobility was obviously limited even moreso. Even though it is not that big of a deal, it is easy to draw the contrast between what is and is not possible to do with very young kids. I simply have a difficult time restraining my comments about what is not possible.
To those without kids, I do apologize if I make a point of what I am not able to do. I'm not bitter about the situation or anything like that, but I still don't think that my making the occasional comment is something that I am going to be able to change.
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7 comments:
Look on the bright side, we saw 3 movies in the theatre this summer!! We can do more if we are willing to pay for a sitter.
Actually, that's right. We did pretty good this summer, too. So, my pointing out how difficult it is to do things and deal with NJ is not completely valid.
I know all too well. But Woogy is at a age were he can go to some movies. Me and Woogy went to nearly all the movies I wanted to see this summer including "the Simpsons"
I think it is a very valid reply, because it is in a sense a nice way to say that your interest are still there, but it's just not feasibly possible at this point in time.
But newlyweds will use there marriage as an excuse too. Like, we just want to stay in this weekend.
I still like to see movies at the theater, but I must admit that it is not at the top of our priorities as a couple - it's expensive, it's not a good date night in terms of conversation (something that you need when kids take up your time), it's a waste of valuable time given the hours you have to spend with a sitter, dvd's and rentals are much cheaper, etc.
Dash and I are just now venturing out for the occasional movie. The kids get to stay home and have free reign. They fix their own dinners and snacks and pick a movie or two while we're out. Freedom has never been so sweet--for all of us! :)
We have three young married couples here that are not allowed to drive - being Missionary Associates per IMM policy manual. None of them have children. I feel like I am an uncle who drops people off everywhere. I have fun as well, but I realize that for Roamer and I there is always someone around on the mission field that could fit the various stages of children.
I didn't realize that people with kids every realized that they do that. Not so much with our friends, but I've had people in other situations, talk down to me, a lower life form without a kids. Surely I can at least be sympathetic, even if I don't live it? Thanks for noticing!
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