on the fringe

Earlier in the week I tried watching Fringe. There was little point. I don't really have time to add another hour-long television show to my schedule, but I figured I had to give it a chance. If I later decided I wanted to watch it, I would be behind rather quickly.

The show is supposed to be a new version of The X-Files, and it really is, but I was amazed at how slowly paced it was. I think this is because it was a longer episode, but I am using this as a reason to avoid watching the show for now. If someone else gets into it and disagrees with my assessment I might give it another chance.

It does not appear that I will be watching any of the new shows this season. I have plenty returning shows which will adequately fill my time, and Fringe was probably the only new show that warranted a try. I also watched Hole in the Wall, but I haven't had any delusions that it would be a show that I would need to regularly tune in to. It is entertaining enough, but watching two episodes that I have already seen is good enough.

One or two of the shows that Golden and I watch have already begun. Almost everything else starts in the last week of September. That gives me a week and a half to get my life in order before the schedule changes once again.

a cat with a pipe

I am amazed that the commercial above is actually for a film festival since it pretty effectively illustrates the feelings of those who don't get film festivals. I am wondering if the purpose is to keep those who don't like film festivals away, or if it is to make those who appreciate independent film feel superior in that they get it.

I may not always be the brightest bulb, as they say, but I don't think I am stupid. I am surprised, then, by how often the video above epitomizes my experience with works that are supposed to be heady. I think, and I have speculated on this before, that most of the stuff that I do not get is usually related to the emotional content of the book, movie, play, art, etc. Since I understand colorblindness, I compare my feelings about these works to my inability to see certain shades of color. I just don't understand certain nuances of red, and I just don't understand certain nuances of emotion.

One other thing I don't understand is why the people who do get certain artistic works (or at least who say they do) seem to credit it to superior intelligence or taste. I don't think that intelligence usually plays a role, and I think taste is subjective. To me that's the same as if I got arrogant over the fact that I think I appreciate a Chipotle fajita more than most people can. That kind of conceit borders on the ludicrous.

I guess this means that I won't be visiting any independent film festivals in the near future. As if that's a real shock.

that's rich

While I was with extended family this past weekend a few people mentioned in passing that I make a lot of money, and those comments got back to me. I am not sure where they got this idea. It isn't the first time that someone has made this assumption, though, so I must be putting off some vibe of which I am unaware. Maybe the spoiler on my Taurus is giving the wrong impression.

The only people who know my current salary are the people who have a legitimate reason to know my salary, so it is not like the people who think I have money have direct evidence to link me to said money. Without providing specifics, Golden and I are not poor but we are nowhere near rich by most American standards.

It is a bit weird for people to think you are loaded when you aren't. Most of my life I have been quite the opposite of rich, so the thought that someone might conclude that I have money seems absurd. Since most of my family on that side works in traditional ministry, I guess it is an easy assumption that someone who works in technology is loaded. It is a flawed assumption, though. Most of the IT workers I know are solidly middle class, though there are certainly exceptions. Being a single-income family keeps us a step or two out of Bill Gates' and Warren Buffett's league.

There are so many people who want others to think they are richer than they are, but I think I would prefer the opposite. Few of the benefits of people thinking I have money appeal to me. I actually prefer a relatively simple life. The only real advantage to me is that it keeps people from thinking that I am incapable of supporting my family. Apart from that motivation, I would prefer people think I have or make less than I really do.

One thing about which I have some pride is the ability to properly manage what I have. If someone thinks I have a large income but still must exert some effort to make ends meet, the easiest conclusion is that I don't know how to manage my money. I would prefer for people to be amazed that I could make due on a shoestring budget even if I am not actually operating on a shoestring budget.

A few questions always enter my mind when someone thinks I have money. What do they know that I don't? Where can I get that obviously beneficial bit of information?

trip observations

As I noted in my last post, I spent a few days in Pennsylvania to attend my grandmother's funeral. As is usually the case when I travel, I have a few thoughts.

First, I never noticed before, but people in that area have multiple viewings, whereas people in Kansas and Missouri tend to only have one viewing. As a family member, the one viewing is far less taxing.

Second, I have revised my opinions on what I want for my funeral. I had said that I would prefer complete honesty about me in whatever eulogy is delivered. I now think the family should get to decide what specifically happens. Really, the funeral is for the family, so what should I care about how the funeral is handled? The funeral should be part of a healing process, so however it can be most effective in healing is how it should be implemented.

Third, I think that funerals are held too closely to the death of the family member. I think families should take about a week to get beyond being shellshocked over the death before having to set up arrangements for a memorial service. Three or four days after a death just seems too soon.

Fourth, how do they train the stewardesses on flights to look so happy when acting out how to operate a seat belt and strap an oxygen mask on your head? I definitely couldn't look so genuinely happy during that portion of the job.

Fifth, I nearly got stuck in Washington D.C. by tropical storm Hanna. At least to hear the pilot on my flight into Washington, you would think so. That experience, coupled with a few other bad experiences in recent years with airlines, has really dampened my desire to ever fly again. I know I will have to at some point, but something always seems to go wrong. If the things that went wrong were things that I could control that would be one thing, but I have yet to figure out a way to control things like inclement weather or lost luggage. If I could, I would prefer to just take the time to drive the entire way.

I hope that the next time I see family it is under better circumstances.

bereavement leave

If you are reading this on Thursday morning, I am almost certainly somewhere between Kansas City and Pittsburgh, and likely somewhere in the air. For those who don't know, my grandmother passed away early Tuesday morning, and the funeral is this Friday.

My flight leaves (or, left for when you are reading this) Thursday at 6AM, as all cheaper flights do. I am always that cheap person who isn't willing to spend the money to fly at a reasonable hour. As a result, I am getting (have gotten) up before 4AM to get to the airport in time.

I don't really have much more to say right now. I basically wanted to note why I didn't have anything to say. I'll probably have something more on Saturday when I get back. Until then, au revoir.

our little energizer bunny

NJ has always been a good napper. He may miss a nap here or there, but he is generally pretty good about going to sleep when he is put down. Over the last week or so that has started changing.

This weekend I switched his crib to a transitional toddler bed, so now he can get out of bed whenever he wants. Since he is not stuck in bed he has been getting up to play rather than going to sleep in the afternoon. Over the past few days, this has definitely cut into his nap time. Yesterday, he didn't even take a nap.

Another issue is that recently his nap has slowly been occurring later and later. He used to go to bed between 12PM and 1PM. In the week prior to switching out his crib his nap was starting anywhere from 2PM to 4PM.

All of this is an issue because our schedule, and especially Golden's, is structured around his afternoon nap. She has been catching a nap and getting chores done while he sleeps. If he is going to be constantly awake that will change how the schedule operates. I appreciate the down time as well when I am around. Golden noted yesterday that the day just seemed to go forever since NJ had been up for so much of it.

Hopefully, if he continues to skip his nap he will make up for it by going to bed a little earlier and getting up a little later. Golden needs a rest at some point because, unlike NJ, she can't keep going and going and going and...

selfish

Last weekend I was in a session where the audience was all couples when the person leading the session noted that selfishness is the thing that causes the most problems in marriage. She noted that she thought that fact was strange until she got married. Now it makes a lot of sense. I have to concur.

Everyone is a bit selfish, and I am not talking about that specifically. The people I am referring to are those who don't really aren't too concerned about what other people may want.

I cannot imagine what it would be like to be married to someone who is entirely self-absorbed. I obviously don't know that sort of life first-hand, but it must be rough. The person you are married to is so important to every aspect of your life that being in a marital commitment with someone who only cares about meeting his or her needs would be prison. Bad habits can be undone. Differences of opinion can be tolerated. For those who want to go that route, even physical issues can be addressed. How do you put up with someone who is only concerned about his or her own self over the long haul, though?

I wonder if this is why God uses the marriage metaphor so much in the Bible. Israel was the unfaithful wife, like Gomer to Hosea. The Church is Christ's bride. God fulfills our needs, so our commitment is not unsatisfying. When Israel or the Church turns away from Him, though, is it somehow unsatisfying for Him?

What I don't understand, though, is what kind of needs God could have. Everyone who goes into marriage does so with the understanding that the person he or she is marrying is there to fulfill something that is lacking in his or her life. I do not think of God as needing anything, though, so why introduce a metaphor like this that requires me to think of God in this merely human way? Is there some value in the metaphor that I am missing? Does God willingly force Himself to need the Church even though vulnerability like that seems like it should contradict His nature?

For Golden and for God, I still need to work on reducing my level of selfishness.