We have a family reunion this September. I don't get to see family all that often, and they haven't seen NJ enough. There is one drawback, though. Since it is in eastern Pennsylvania and Golden will be in her seventh month of pregnancy we aren't going. I need to notify my aunt, who is heading this up, by tomorrow that I will not be able to attend.
My mom's side of the family is very close. Most holidays when I was growing up were spent with them, even when I didn't live near them. We moved around a bit, so I didn't have many lifelong friends, but I did have a cousin or two with whom I was close. Those are reasons why going to the reunion would be a good thing.
On the bad side, making such a trip is expensive, time-consuming, exhausting, and not really a vacation, as we would be travelling with a two-year-old. It would be a pretty serious hardship for us to attend. This is even ignoring that Golden will be in her third trimester. Even with the expense, I think that we would probably go if Golden wasn't pregnant. Everything combined makes us going unrealistic, though.
There are a lot of family things that we miss because we live the farthest away from where everyone else is. This is just one more example. I understand that I knew the drawbacks of living far from family when I chose Kansas, but I wish that someone else could play spoilsport for these events rather than myself at some point. Since the family is close, there is some expectation to make sacrifices for family to be together. I wish I wasn't always the one giving the appearance of not being willing to make the sacrifice.
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5 comments:
I know what you mean. My dad kept us far from big family events. I never really got to know much of my extended family.
I know how family can make you feel for not attending, when you live 1800 miles away. It is hard, but the expense is hard to ignore. I could not imagine driving with kids that far. You are amazed by us doing so much, fitting so much into our vacations, but I am amazed you drive NJ so far. We would want to kill each other, I think, by the end. That's why the kids and I flew out here when we moved and BB drove by himself.
I have had my limit of traveling with a toddler. I feel bad also, because we don't see everybody at X-mas and we didn't go to 2 cousins weddings.
It's difficult to make it to everything, especially when you live far away. It's nice to be missed, but sometimes the guilt of missing overkills the being missed.
We always stayed home for Thanksgiving. We did not travel. Even with my sister Tammy starting this tradition, every year my mom would start with the guilt trips. Tammy gave in more then I did which made it worse. "Well, Tammy's coming in...."
Everyone is kind not to rub it in on us -- but we still feel it. I expect it will get worse as people age.
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