careful what you wish for

I know this sounds weird to hear, but I remember when Tiffany Trump was born.  Clearly I wasn't there, but I remember it announced on the news.  It had minor significance to me at the time that I thought would be passing, but reflecting on that memory today has put in perspective for me how much viewpoints can change in one's life.

Ms. Trump was born at a time when my dad was moving between jobs, and so our family was living with my grandparents in a reasonably lengthy interim.  There wasn't a lot of money available in our family at the time, and while I did not grow up rich by any stretch, we were especially poor at that time.  The adults in the picture at the time (my parents, grandparents, and great aunt) all tried to make the best of it, and I was given more or less full reign in my grandparents' basement as my room, which was nice.  So, we weren't destitute on the street, but a big part of my personal identity at the time was feeling broke and trying very hard not to look poor.

At the time all I knew about Mr. Trump was that he lived in New York and was wealthy due to some businesses in the city.  I knew nothing of his personality, the nature of his businesses, who was in his family, or anything.  In a passing statement in the evening news the anchor mentioned that Mr. Trump and Marla Maples had a new daughter that they were naming "Tiffany" after the jewelry store.  The anchor implied that he owned the store, but my understanding now is that he just had business dealings with them.  I remember that all I could think in that moment was that this was a kid who was going to have a much easier time in life than I was having as I experienced a moment of envy.

Fast forward to my current adult life, and I understand today that the source of my envy could not be further from the truth.  I don't know anything about Tiffany Trump, but I do know that I would have hated my life being in now-President Trump's spotlight with all of the associated scandals.  I don't know her relationship with her father, but I do know that it's a running gag among comedians that her relationship isn't as good as with the president's other children.  That alone would be painful.  I don't know a ton about how Mr. Trump parented his kids, but the sources I have heard have indicated that he left a lot of that to the children's mothers.  From money or not, I can't imagine a more isolating situation to live in.

She clearly doesn't crave the limelight, because she'd be in it if she did, but her name is one that almost everyone in the country knows.  It would be hard to establish deep friendships because people already have an opinion of her before meeting her, and who's to say they aren't trying to use her to get to her dad.  How would you even do something as simple as go on a date?  It would be like getting all of the drawbacks of being a celebrity with the only positive being a bit of extra wealth.

I've heard warnings all of my life about being careful for what you wish for.  It's a very common trope in entertainment.  Still, you don't really appreciate the advice as much until you see it play itself out in action.  I really would not ever want to trade my life with that of anyone in the Trump family, and that's something my fourteen-year-old self would have been surprised to hear.